Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Challenges, Modeling, and Small Slices of Happiness

People assume I enjoy challenges. I don't know where they get that idea, but I don't have that impression about me. Most often, I find more joy in the fact that someone is willing to take a chance and allow me to give it a shot, whatever it may be... an opportunity to step up to the plate. Perhaps that is why I've always loved science: understanding it was never difficult, but applying science and actually performing delicate experiments... there is always a chance that things will go wrong.

I challenge myself to do things, mostly physically because there is a greater chance of failure. Maybe that's why I dance... coordination and grace have never been my fortes.

As for dancing, well, it has been a long three weeks off! I'm very much ready for students to come back so I can get back to shaking my booty, er, um, my, uh... my... you don't really shake anything in a waltz, come to think of it. Oh well, I'm ready!

I'm cutting myself off from watching "America's Next Top Model." That show, in addition to being as superficial and mind-numbing as possible, is slowly whittling away at my self-esteem. I could go into a long and valid argument about how TV made me smarter, because it really did (I somehow managed to choose "smart" shows while growing up)... but sometimes I don't make those brilliant choices and end up watching bad TV when I get really bored. So anyway, these models are crazy! They are so into fashion and being fake, it is painful to watch. But I do it anyway. Over the course of a few hours listening to judges tell girls who range from size 0 to size 2 that they're too fat, I take one look at my size 6 butt in the mirror and gasp! ...on my way to the 'fridge to get another slice of cold pizza. :) I have gained some weight since I moved back home, but that extra weight bumped me from the slightly underweight line to totally normal and healthy weight. Am I feeling a bit depressed because I'm "normal" now, because I am watching "bad" TV, or because there are so many other pressures acting upon me to be even thinner?

On the flip side, I'm way into "Mythbusters" on the American Chopper Channel (formerly Discovery). Nothing like a show that takes science from "zzzzzzzz" to "WHOA!" I just had a huge flashback to "Blossom" and Joey Lawrence there...

And my sister is cleaning her closet again, which means I get to go "shopping." Nothing like stylish, quality, free clothes that have been worn two or three times.

I took last night to watch three of my favorite old JAG episodes, to reflect, to be inspired, to think, to relax. You know what? I'm still stuck on Harm after all these years...

No comments: