Monday, April 30, 2007

Movie of Lebanon, Oregon

A short video showcasing the area around Lebanon, Oregon. I'll take my green, green grass over your people-filled cities any day. If you have questions about locations (as in, you'd like to visit these places), let me know with a comment. Enjoy the show.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

I'm not buyin' it!

The pink madness is starting to drive me a little nuts.

I absolutely support funding for breast cancer research, so please don't misunderstand me. My grandmother, aunt, and cousin have all been breast cancer survivors--odds are that I, too, will have breast cancer.

My rant today lies in the pink ribbons on every sort of merchandise one can imagine. My mom bought a pink KitchenAid stand mixer. Sure, we didn't need it, but they're awfully nice, and she does a lot of cooking and baking, and that was her Christmas present this year. I could understand getting a white one or even a red or blue one... but no. She went out to spend an extra hundred dollars on a pink one to "support breast cancer research." My sister bought slippers and socks and charms and other things...

What about the other kinds of cancer that kill people every day? Where are the cervical cancer ribbons on coffee mugs? What about brain, lung, stomach, and skin cancer? Don't forget about the guys... prostate cancer is no less serious than breast cancer.

Furthermore, I fail to understand how a pink ribbon can do anything. When I support cancer research, it's generally in a check or with cash directly to a person or research foundation.

When support is overtaken by marketing gimmicks, I stop buying and start asking questions.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Astoria Adventure!

I survived the adventure, and that's saying something considering all of the things I experienced. Overall, my trip was a lot of fun, a little scary sometimes, and quite exciting. What did I do, where did I go, and who did I meet?

Getting There
The journey started right here on my blog. TH made a few comments, along with some other Astoria-area bloggers. I'd been thinking about getting out of the valley for a long time, and finally I was given a reason to leave. I requested Friday off from work, experiencing my first day of paid vacation ever. Mom and Dad woke up me early, by 7am, and I was on the road to the coast by 9am. I-5 was a nice drive north, aside from the usual Friday truck traffic. I got onto 217 and Hwy 26 without any difficulties. After a brief pit-stop not far from Banks to stretch and eat, I picked up Hwy 101 just south of Seaside, and was never lost or hesitant about my location until just south of Astoria. They have a lot of water up there, and a lot of little bridges. Holy crap, that was crazy. I made it to the Columbia River Maritime Museum just after 12:00pm.

The Museum
I've always loved visiting museums, and I've wanted to see the Maritime Museum since I first learned they had a lightship there. The museum was excellent! Few people, the opportunity to wander around on my own, and the chance to take tons of photographs made this a great museum for me. I ended up getting over a hundred photos! And there was one guy who kept following me around a little bit, trying to make small talk and conversation about the exhibits... he creeped me out. I wandered outside to the Lightship Columbia, a nearby Coast Guard cutter, and another Army ship. The Lightship was pretty neat, but I got a little seasick tied up to the dock (I'm such a wimp). I did not board either of the other two boats as the CG cutter wasn't giving tours at the time, and there was a large crowd of retired soldiers on the Army ship, and I didn't feel right intruding on their moment. A quick trip to the museum store merited me two pencils for my collection (yay!). I left the museum around 2:00pm and headed south to Tillamook on Hwy 101. By this time, I'd only consumed a can of pop, so I was well on my way to a caffeine withdrawal headache. I was also very tired. How I made it safely to Tillamook, I don't know, but I did.

Rachel managed to get off work early, so I drove out to her place on Netarts Bay. She has a cool house! We hung out for a little bit before going on a long walk for pop and chips. This long walk was very much needed after sitting in my car a good five hours already. We caught up and had a lot of fun wandering around before leaving to meet TH in Wheeler. The good news is that we took a great backroad up to Wheeler. The bad news is that we were about an hour early.

Meeting TH

Rachel and I wandered up and down the whole two blocks that make up Wheeler. We went inside a little restaurant and found a table. Mr. TH only knew that I'd be wearing one sweatshirt or another, and I didn't have much of an idea what he looked like, so when we spied him through the window as he saw us... it was a pretty neat moment. He came inside and sat down for what ended up being a really good pizza dinner. No, my friend was not carrying any weapons. I was only nervous about him for a nanosecond--he put me right at ease. AND he is definitely the gentleman. Rachel and I were both impressed. :) Plus, he paid for dinner, and a girl can't argue with that. THANKS!!!

Sleepy Time
Rachel drove me back to Tillamook to stay with her. We got back by 9:30pm, and after some chatting, we called it a night. I slept on the old couch from the house we shared in Corvallis--the ugly-as-sin-but-comfortable-as-ever couch. Since I hadn't been sleeping well the last week, and because all the traveling and touring really wore me out, I crashed hard from 10:00pm to 6:00am, and dozed until 7:30am when Rachel came out of her room. I scrambled to get ready, said my good-byes, and was on the road north by 8:00am.

North to Fort Clatsop
I took Hwy 101 north to Miami River Road, and from there, I'm not really sure what roads I took, but I made it to Fort Clatsop in just under two hours on backroads. TH told me to call him when I got to Seaside, but I never saw Seaside... so I called him when I got to the park. I paid admission and did some reading while I waited a few minutes for him to arrive. We wandered into the reconstruction, through the visitor's center, and down to the Netul Landing. I got a few nice pictures, but overall this place seemed quite touristy to me. TH suggested we visit another place he thought to be picture-worthy.

Young's River Falls
A short drive from Fort Clatsop found us at a nice waterfall. First, nothing says trust like going to a secluded place with a person you met less than twenty-four hours before. Second, TH was right! I got several great photos. Even better, TH let his doggy run around and terrorize some rocks. I'm usually afraid of dogs, but this one was friendly and never barked at me. I think I like him (the dog). We sat in the sun, chatted for a long time, and decided to return to Astoria for lunch.

Downtown Nightmare
TH knows that I'm terrified of heights. I think that's why he took me to the top of 8th Street in order to get me downtown. I've driven on hills before, but holy fucking shit. San Francisco has nothing on Astoria when it comes to hills. (In Lebanon, the largest hill we have in town is the slight rise at the Y on Hwy 20. I think it's a five or six foot drop over a hundred feet.) Needless-to-say, I'm never following him anywhere again. We did make it safely to a restaurant for lunch, and I had some divine fettuccine. Yet again, TH was a kind gentleman and paid for lunch. I swear, this girl has never had it so good! We parted ways around 2:30pm, and I made a pit-stop for gas downtown before heading out Hwy 101.

Traffic Accident
After last month's little fender-not-so-bender here in Lebanon, I've learned to watch distances and traffic in front of me a little better. I noticed the pickup in front of me speeding up and breaking frequently, so I held back a bit on purpose. Following me was a large pickup, perhaps a Ford F-350. I didn't want to become a little white pancake. We were in heavy traffic as we approached the large intersection where people can turn west and go into Warrenton from Hwy 101. The light switched from green to red, and a car slammed on it's brakes to stop. The Outback behind that rear-ended the car, and the pickup in front of me collided violently with the Outback. I watched the pickup crumple in front of me, shrinking a good two feet in the wreck. I felt pretty bad for the guy driving the pickup... it still had dealer plates on it. I slowed down and stopped with enough time to see the radiator explode and ended up pulling over to the side of the road to act as a witness. State Police were headed north and were at the scene in under two minutes. Nobody was hurt, but everybody that saw it was pretty shaken. I told the officer that I couldn't give more information than could obviously be seen (two cars rear-ended the cars in front of them, and the pick-up was badly mangled). The officer let me go on my way without taking a statement. Traffic sucked on Hwy 101 after that.

Going Home
I kept a good following distance the whole way back over Hwy 26 after witnessing the accident. As much as I love the coast, there was a little part of me that smiled when I saw my first grass field that stretched forever and ever. The Cascades are a sight I missed. I made it from Astoria to Lebanon in under three hours, but I was still pretty tense. Not sure about the exact mileage, but it's close to 170 miles between the two cities... and I drove well over 500 miles in two days. I was home by 5:30pm, unpacked and out of the shower by 7:00pm, and even edited my pictures already.

THANK YOU, TH, for being so kind!

And I figured out how to teach people to say "Lebanon." Lebanon rhymes with Oregon. It's kind of like "Leb-uh-nun" but the "uh" is short and the accent is on the first syllable. In case you or anyone was wondering.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Origami Flowers

Okay, so I don't have anything creative to say again, but I do have pictures of my latest origami creations.

I made three flowers, attached them to wire stems, cut leaves and grassy stuff, and made a vase.

This little project is on my desk at work, and I must say... it gets knocked over soooooo much.

If anyone has suggestions on what to make next, I'm all ears (fingers and paper, really). Most of my origami projects are traditional: one square, no cuts or glue. I'm not opposed to modular projects (using more than one piece of paper), or cutting paper either.

Work was boring today: I burned twenty five CDs and wrapped up half a dozen little projects. I also spent a considerable amount of time driving hit counters up on various blogs... sorry about that. I was pretty bored.

Tomorrow should be interesting: the guys in the business are taking the office ladies out for a fancy lunch. The division there sounds sexist, but I swear it's not... just coincidence that the women are in charge and control the world. :D Part of me dreads going because of the restaurant, but part of me wants to go out of morbid curiosity (to see what the guys are like outside the office). Part of me just wants to go to BK and order a great big hamburger and fries. :D

So there you have it. Flowers and a post, all at once. Happy Administrative Professionals' Day!

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Virtual 'Room Raiders'

MTV used to have a show called "Room Raiders" where three people (either guys or gals) would be removed from their houses and a stranger of the opposite sex (generally) would go into their rooms to try to learn as much as they could about the room's owner, and then they'd select a date based on the room they liked best. MTV culture aside, that's a pretty thoughtful premise: the stuff you have around you is probably a good indication of the person you are.

But then, of course, I had to ask myself, if someone raided my room, what would they find? Do I appear mature or feminine or intelligent or ...?

If you raided my room, you'd find:

-a made bed and tidy room
-two operational (but one running) computers, a GPS, and a TV.
-a teddy bear and a doll on my bed.
-several photographs and poster-pictures, some with award ribbons hanging from them.
-a couple intricate works of origami.
-a stack of drawers in my closet full of crafting supplies.
-two bookcases: one floor-to-ceiling oak case with science textbooks and historical writings and stories, a shelf of old notebooks containing various papers and writings; and a smaller bookcase with tons of adolescent literature.
-a voodoo doll... with pins stuck all over in it.
-a box containing paid bills and receipts, organized and filed.
-both a high school diploma and a college diploma, sitting on my dresser.
-a small, empty bottle of Pravda vodka.
-tons of pencils.
-good lighting and lots of homemade wooden furniture.

What does my room say to you?

Monday, April 23, 2007

Too Tired to Stamp Straight

I couldn't keep my eyes open today. Don't know why, but staying awake at work this morning was a huge chore. I awoke early, by 6:00am, without the aid of an alarm clock. I popped out of bed, got ready for work, got to work, and *crash*. I was sitting there staring at the screen looking for the correct icon to click on and couldn't get the program to open. I kept clicking, but nothing happened. I opened my eyes a bit more to see the cursor about three inches from where it needed to be. One of the computer guys spied my heavy eyelids and was making fun of me through my window (that looks out into a hallway).

The worst of it was when I was date-stamping some papers. I inked the stamp, smudged it on my paper, flipped the paper, and went to repeat the process... but couldn't get any ink to go on the paper. I pounded the stamp into the ink pad a few times and tried again. No stampy. WTF? Pound, pound, pound again. No stampy. Getting frustrated, I focused my eyes on the stamp pad to see if it was not functioning correctly. Umm, well... apparently I was not quite hitting the stamp pad and was instead attempting to retrieve ink from the lid half. A bunch of fuzzy black marks with today's date smeared around clued me in. At that point, I gave up stamping.

Tonight, I'm going to bed early.

Sunday, April 22, 2007


Here it is, at long last, the revenge TH deserves for this little picture.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

I'm really going to get this done!

After so many weekends of accomplishing little-to-nothing, I feel like spending one doing something. Instead of sitting here at the computer IMing and blogging, I figure I'll try to get the following things done:

-Work on TH's revenge project
-Film TH's revenge project
-Design and create a back support for my desk chair at work
-Purchase a new mouse pad/wrist support for home (since I took the old one to work)
-Clean out desk and closet
-Record new piano music for MySpace music page (not happening)
-Pre-write some blog posts
-Go see a movie (not happening)
-Balance checkbook
-Finish book
-Draw map
-Upload sketches

UPDATE: I've made some serious progress on this list today, and I have high hopes for tomorrow. While cleaning, I managed to "File 13" a whole garbage bag full of recycling (because I would rather recycle than throw away) -- and only had to throw one thing away because it cannot be recycled. I also made a delicious lunch for Dad and myself, and even made dinner for my sister and her boyfriend. Furthermore, I removed the card table from my room that had my old computer on it, and made a bunch more space in this cave I call a bedroom. Someone recently expressed interest in seeing some of my sketches (sometimes I get bored and doodle), so I hope to scan those soon for your viewing horror. AAAANNNNNDDDD, I think I made myself sick last night drinking. I had tomato soup and grilled cheese last night for dinner, washed that down with a strawberry daquiri, and tossed a giant super-rich brownie and some Diet Coke on top of the rest. Note to readers: that was a very, very bad idea. Back to work... I have a couple hours before I'll fall over.

UPDATE #2: Maps are hard to draw. I pulled one together, though, and I'm pleased with the result. Hopefully it'll be helpful, because a map that isn't helpful isn't worth much. I scratched both going to a movie and uploading new music off my list because they aren't happening anyway. Nobody wants to go see the movie I want to see, and I don't want to go alone. Eh, it means not spending that $10. :) And I really want to upload new music, but it means dragging a computer out to the piano to record, edit, re-record, re-edit... it just takes too much effort for me right now. Plus, I have to install the drivers on this computer (if Vista will even accept them), install Cakewalk, and pray that it all works together. I'm not ready for that headache. Maybe next month... or the next. Bedtime!

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Videos of me DANCING!

This week's topic doesn't seem to be going over very well. Phooey. You people are just no fun.

I haven't figured out how to upload YouTube videos to Blogger yet, but when I do...

HOT OFF THE PRESS: TWO NEW VIDEOS! of me... dancing!

You can view them here!!!

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Sex and Fortune Cookies

In keeping with the theme of the week, this is about a little game my friends and I like to play. When you open a fortune cookie and read the fortune, append the words "in bed" to the end and see how it changes the meaning of the fortune. Some examples:

"You will obtain your goal if you maintain your course... in bed."
"Everyone agrees you are the best... in bed."
"Avoid taking unnecessary gambles... in bed."

P.S. Adding "with a battle ax" to the end can also lead to some hilarity. Any others?

Sunday, April 15, 2007

The Big City - Again

Yet another adventure to Portland! Mom, Dad, and I drove up to visit Powell's City of Books, to eat at Sweet Tomatoes, and to get out of the house. :)

Powell's is very big. I love libraries and bookstores, but this place was... big always seems like such a small word to describe what I mean. I tried very hard to remember the authors of the books I was looking for, but there were a few I just couldn't remember. In all, I spent forty-five minutes wandering aisle to aisle looking at books. Ended up getting three books, all of them quite cheap compared to buying them online.

Portland is such an odd place for me. I am not used to seeing different types of businesses smashed up against one another. Here, there is a section for residential, a block for industrial... there, it's just a jumble. All around, I saw concrete and brick. There is no room for green in the city. I don't think I could live in a place with so many people either. Diversity is fine, and having so many opportunities is great, but I don't like having to watch my back all the time. I'm aware and careful here--I don't wander around alone very often--but that basic trust in people disappears (for me) in the big city. And I can't believe how expensive parking is! Ugh. A trip to the smelly, crowded, noisy city is more than enough to make me thankful for little ol' Lebanon. :)

We ran into Sur la Table for a few minutes. I enjoy the occasional kitchen store--this one was fancy! and expensive. Anybody need a spatula for $15? or a baking pan for $50? Ugh.

Two pictures here: the first is of a building... I really liked how the clouds reflected in the windows. The second is of some neat metalwork fish not far from a small "park."

And then I came home, washed my grey car back into it's natural white color, and started reorganizing my stacks of books. That was, until TH started distracting with some instant messaging...

Saturday, April 14, 2007


Blogosphere, meet Isabelle. She is an overweight, spoiled, ridiculously expressive princess of a cat. I was out taking pictures of flowers when she sauntered over to say hello.

Isabelle doesn't go by her name. We usually call her "Goobie." She's a funny cat. Here, she wouldn't look at the camera because the grass was too distracting.

Is she a cat or a cow?!

Simon. He's giving a pissy face here because I wouldn't put down the camera to pet him.

Pet me! He's a smart cookie, gettin' all cute so that I'll play with him. The sun was out, and he was loving the warm concrete.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Be a Good Blogger

I blog. I try to be a responsible blogger, but sometimes things get a little out of hand. Recently, I made a comment on a blog that was misinterpreted. Sarcasm doesn't go over the blog-waves very well, and being a sarcastic person, the meaning was lost in translation. I received an angry reply, and posted something in return myself, but then deleted both the first and last comments. I didn't feel the need to justify myself or say anything more. The damage was done.

The anonymity created by blogs is deceiving. I post here every day. My connection is between my head, the keyboard, and the screen. What you read are thoughts--my thoughts--the things I choose to put here. I don't necessarily think long and hard about every word. I don't know who you are, where you are, what you think, or if you will like what I write, so I have to shoot from the hip and hope for the best.

But then again, several of you actually know me. Some of you know that I'm not really "Jaggy."
If you know where to look, you could probably get a lot of personal information here about me and figure out who I am. If I say something offensive, I'm anything but safe. Accountability is hard when you can't see the consequences.

As I have learned so well this week, blogging is a choice and decision. Being smart, being responsible and accountable for what you say is also important, though. It's okay to say whatever you want to say--as long as you know that it might come back to bite you later.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Hand me the Vicodin, please.

I went dancing tonight, and I had a nice time. Sometime during the day, though, I must have sat wrong or something, because by 7pm, my back kinda hurt. The back pain problem grew steadily worse until, during a Lindy, my partner threw me a bit. I've never learned the lead for this move, so I was not ready for it, plus I can't land on my right leg due to a weak knee. I landed funny and my pelvis shifted or something. I'm pretty sure he noticed I was in pain since he gave me a weird look, but we finished the song. Next up was a fast Hustle. I'd previously promised a boy the dance, and I'm rarely one to turn down a Hustle. I absolutely cannot fault anyone but myself here (so I hope you two boys realize my pain is NOT because of you). The fast song ended, and I, reeling, stumbled over to change my shoes. The distance from the building to my car is perhaps thirty feet. I had to go down two ramps, around a corner, and out of the building, and it still took me five minutes.

I wish I had something better to post tonight, but I'm not really in the mood. I hadn't intended to post tonight at all - thus, you got pictures yesterday as a bonus post. So I'm out for the night.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Spring Pictures

"Silk Tulip"
(that's a real flower)

I don't know how those flowers get their color, but I find it pretty amazing how vibrant flowers can be.

I was leaning over the fence shooting this picture into the neighbor's backyard. Talk about creepy, seeing me take pictures like that... but I was taking pictures of flowers, I swear!

The Lilies hadn't come up yet, but the buds look pretty awesome from above. This is outside our kitchen window.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Day of Disjoint

I'm eating a cheap chocolate bunny, the only gift I received this Easter, and halfway through one hollow ear, I'm becoming more and more thankful. This is not good chocolate.

Between a congested commute to work and lunchtime traffic with my sister today, I was nearly in five car accidents. I don't even live in a highly populated area! A long drive home after work and visiting Grandpa did me some good. Fields are about as green as they get on a cloudy day here in the valley--renews my spirit to be in the flatland.

I saw Grandpa for the first time since he went into the hospital in mid-February. His dementia is extensive, and the Parkinson's has crippled his body. He had almost no clue I was even there tonight and only responded to Grandma after some badgering. I realized tonight that I've been avoiding seeing him -- and that made me feel awful. He has better days when he does recognize people... tonight was not one of them. It was just a difficult night in that respect.

Rachel IMed to tell me one of the bills from our house in Corvallis wasn't paid. We moved out in June--almost a year ago--and we're just now finding out about this bill. I swear I paid them all, and I have the check carbon copies to prove it. She says the bill has been turned over to collections. I am waiting to hear more, but I think it's a bunch of crap. It is possible that the bill ought to go to the landlord for the time between when we moved out and the new tenants moved in... at least that's my opinion.

And tonight, I came home to a very unusual message on MySpace from a "friend." Scott Grimes and Dave Harris are musicians and songwriters, and they sent me a quick "hello" tonight. I honestly thought it was spam, but on a whim, I responded. You know what? It wasn't spam. They really messaged me. Crazy and cool all at once. Wonder if they've figured out that I am a musician too...

I changed my blog, MySpace, and Facebook profile pictures to the same "new" picture. I don't think it's a particularly great one... but I'm receiving a ton of unexpected attention for it. Not complaining one bit! Just a little curious as to why...

Now I must leave you. I have sweet revenge to seek on a Mr. TH for a rather popular picture of "me."

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Stepping Into My Own

What an unusual weekend...

Yesterday was quiet. I watched three movies, had dinner out, hurt my elbow, and was up until 3am chatting friends online. I got up late today, did more chatting, and have been mostly unproductive for the third weekend in a row. I did take time this afternoon to visit Grandma--a nice visit telling her all about my boy drama. And tonight, I would like to finish this origami project I started last weekend.

I spent a lot of time this weekend rethinking how I've lived my life. I feel as though I've been running around like a back-up singer in a rock band or something, not standing out the way I should. Instead of running up to the mic and taking charge of the stage, I've been walking out calmly, singing the song, and walking off the stage. I'm not the leading lady in the movie of my life. Realizing that has taken several years, and admitting it was pretty hard. I'm learning how to play one role instead of jumping from one to another.

Another way to look at it:
When a girl puts on make-up, some people say she becomes a different person. People ask me why I love my green contacts, if they make me a different person. At first, I thought they did. But as I grow, I'm learning that simply because I'm wearing make-up, contacts, a skirt, or whatever, I don't have to change. I am slowly developing the confidence to see myself in many ways instead of relying on others to tell me who I am.

As for Easter: it passed quietly, marked only by a new friend. You know who you are. :)

Saturday, April 07, 2007

Ornery Boy + Photoshop = HOT PICTURE!

I got HOT! That's right, hop over to North Coast Oregon to check me out.

FYI, TH, this is war.

Ow, that's going to bruise...

My parents, sister, her boyfriend, and I went to dinner in Albany tonight. As we pulled into the driveway and parked, I attempted to exit Dad's truck. I don't ordinarily ride in the truck (we only took it because Dad and Patrick are so tall that it's the only vehicle we could all ride in comfortably). In stepping down and out, I somehow smacked my elbow on part of the door.


I pretty much crumpled to the ground in severe pain. I realize I'm prone to exaggeration, but as I learned from the three blisters earlier this week, I also apparently have a high pain tolerance. I seriously thought part of my arm had fallen off.

The bone isn't broken. The skin isn't broken. But the bruising has already started in only two hours.

I was really hoping I wasn't as accident-prone as I thought... guess I need a padded room.

No, no, no. I need a man to keep me safe and protected from evil truck doors. Yes, that is a much better solution.

But the padded room wouldn't hurt... ;)

Valley/Cabin Fever

As I was driving home last night, the glowing world lit up like a mid-summer's evening, I kept seeing motorcyclists burning rubber in the opposite direction. I couldn't help but be jealous of their ride. The warm wind flowing under their helmet, the engine's rumble passing through their body, grassy field slipping past their line of vision one field after another... I wanted so much to be there, a passenger on the road to destinations unknown.

I was talking to my dad last night, explaining that I feel an urge to get out of the valley for a weekend. I can't remember the last time I left the state. This last August, I made it over the mountains for my cousin's wedding--and last May, I was at the coast. I've been all over the state, having seen rocks and historical signs in just about every county... I know there are tons of things left to see in Oregon. I don't know what I want to see next, but I know I need to get out of the valley. I need a vacation.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Six Intersecting Squares

I love folding paper into three-dimensional art. This is a modular piece made from twenty-four sheets of 5:11 paper. Each color is four sheets folded into a ring-like square-ish shape, and then the squares are slid together to make this completed shape. I folded all of the pieces in about two hours, but assembling took another two hours. Okay, it really took two days because I assembled it incorrectly the first time, couldn't figure out what I did wrong, got frustrated, thought about throwing it against a wall, wadding it up, and lighting it on fire... but I knew I could do it. And I did.

"Six Intersecting Squares"
February, 2007

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Walked Right into that Blister...

My sister and I had a good lunch together. I also ran a few errands after work looking into new jazz shoes (not going to happen), and am getting my leather practice shoes stretched to give me more toe room for more stable spins. In case you missed it, those are dance shoes I'm talking about.

Somehow, I convinced Chris to hang out with me after work. We met at Bald Hill Park and walked around and around. The good news: we're getting along fine, and I don't sense any animosity between us. The bad news: we walked a looooooong way. Including the off-road trail we took, I bet we walked a good three miles. I wasn't wearing great shoes for a walk and ended up with three blisters.

Have I ever mentioned my slight fear and incredible hatred of blisters? Give me blood, give me guts, I'll take bile and pieces of brain or lung... I don't even mind feces if I'm properly covered in protective material. Blisters freak me out.

After our crazy walk, we had dinner and went dancing. Nobody made me dance, and I realize that. But I was going to dance tonight if it killed me. The only thing worse than getting blisters is putting blistered feet into dance shoes. Oooohhh, the pain!

I lasted about an hour of fairly solid dancing. I took a few breaks (during the Latin songs)... though it helped little. On top of sore feet, I was wearing pretty thin. My vision tunneled out after a totally kick-ass Lindy with Chris (that has to be one of the best dances I've done, and I even screwed up half a dozen times).

Showered, popped some blisters (with all manner of sterility, completely grossed out the whole time), and bandaged myself up. I should probably get some water in me... but I'm too tired to move. Tomorrow will come too soon.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Gettin' Ranty

Being young doesn't mean I'm stupid, ignorant, or immature. This fact is largely ignored by people around me every day. I work with older people (not old, older). I interact with and am friends with many people older than me. I wouldn't mind it, except they don't seem to be willing to give me a chance to prove myself. I function best in a personal challenge, a chance to show someone what I can do. I'm educated (more than book smarts), ask questions (too often, really), and can communicate an idea effectively. Why, then, knowing this, are adults so hesitant to allow me to shine? I don't mind starting at the bottom, and I don't mind menial tasks. I'm not asking to run anything or oversee anything... just some trust and faith.

I'm tired of being lectured to. If I wanted a lecture, I'd either go back to school or find my parents and screw up in front of them. It makes me sick when someone assumes something instead of asking a question or keeping their mouth shut.

OH! And I'm tired of political shit. I don't care to discuss politics or talk about people. I don't care who has a family, who supports abortion, or who is or isn't giving X amount to charity. Don't get me wrong, I care about the issues, but I don't like to discuss them. I'm not ignorant: in high school, I studied history, government, and social science more than anything else (including music, art, and science). I just don't feel the need to share with you my opinion of a measure or candidate. If you ask, I might say something, but I won't go out of my way to talk. And if you try to force me to talk, or if you try to convince me of your opinions... I'll either take the opposite stance just to piss you off or ignore you entirely.

I'm also pretty fed up with people judging other people. We all do it, myself included. The challenge lies in not doing it. Unless you know the person very well, and understand the whole situation that directly impacts you, STFU. Judge your own family, maybe your friends... and leave the rest of us alone.

Hmm, sounds kinda like one o' Mr. Guy's "Sick Days" in here... ;)

Monday, April 02, 2007

It Wasn't In The Cards...

A friend challenged me to a game of cribbage tonight, and I gladly took him up on the offer. I brought my A-game, but sadly lost, and lost quite badly as well. At least with that game, I can blame it on the cards. Once you learn the game and basic strategy, it's all in the cards. Tonight... it wasn't in the cards. :( Two out of three? ;)

Call it cliché or whatever, but every time a relationship ends, I seem to go on a healthy food kick and lose weight. I lost some weight dating Chris (mostly because we didn't like many of the same foods and I ended up eating a lot less), and now I'm finding myself in a similar place. I'm unhappy for some reason, and getting [more] fit and healthy seems like it could help. I worry though, because that seems like a trap. I'm more worried that I'm questioning myself in a situation I normally wouldn't.

I love dancing. Dancing is both an emotional and physical release, and it's a great social experience for me. I'm frustrated with myself for living in Lebanon because it means not getting to stay out in Corvallis dancing as much. If I lived there, I could go home after work, make dinner, and then go dancing until 11pm without having to drive thirty minutes home. The trade-off: no rent here. I'm saving a ton of money living with my parents. But I really, really want to be able to stay out and dance Monday and Wednesday nights. At least when I date guys who dance, I generally have an option to stay with them... that's always a big perk.

And then I wish I had some useful insight to share with you tonight... but the truth is, I don't give a shit about anything at the moment. I'm going to find a comic book, immerse myself in an alternate reality, and then sleep.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Long-Lost Friend Comes Home

I had a wonderful visit with my friend from Germany today. He was in town with two of his friends, staying with a kid that grew up down the street from me. I'm amazed how much we've both changed in seven years, and yet... we're still very much the same people. I wish I knew a better way to summarize our conversation, but it wouldn't matter to you anyway. I had a great time reconnecting with a long-lost friend. Our visit was short... but very, very sweet.

I wouldn't trade tonight for anything. :)