Friday, May 30, 2008

Diagnosis: "Rectal Encephalopathy" Prognosis: "Continued Stupidity"

I don't blog about work very often, partly because it's not right, and partly because I don't have much to say. But this week, I answered the phone when one man called, and the conversation I had with him was priceless. My heart goes out to the poor IT slaves who suffer with stupid questions now... I feel your pain.

Earlier this year, I designed a new website for my company (without being compensated thus far, I might add). I'm definitely not a professional at web design, but I can hack through some basic HTML and CSS, and the new site looks like someone spent some time on it. It works, and that's really what we needed more than anything. So this week, a very nice man called to say, "Your website sucks! I can't get it to work." Uh... thanks? What follows is a transcript as close as I can recall:

Me: "Sir, what web browser are you using to access our website?"
Nice man: "The Internet."
Me: "Are you using Internet Explorer or Mozilla Firefox?"
Nice man: "I'm using the Internet."
Me: "I realize that, sir, but what browser are you using?"
Nice man: "The INTERNET."
Me: "Okay, sir, when you clicked on an icon to get to the Internet, what color was the icon? Was it a blue 'e'?"
Nice man: "Yes! That's the IN-TER-NET."
Me: "That's Internet Explorer, and our website is not optimized to work with that browser. If you switch to Firefox, Safari, or Opera, you'll be able to access all of our website's features."

I love my job. :)


Michael Faris said...

holy shit. priceless.

Ian Oberst said...



Welcome to my world. Beware the tubes...there be stupid people here.

The Help(less) Desk said...

what is this Internets i keep hearing about

Eric said...