Friday, July 02, 2010

Output Failure

There are a few lines I dare not cross on my blog: sex, drugs, and politics most often not showing up here.  And while I'll talk about my own experiences, I really do try not to push religion.  But I consider my blog a sort of record of my life, a timeline of events and goings-on that are important to note.  I try to blog about my my experience as a human: the good, the not-so-good, and the traumatic.

This week falls under not-so-good.  And it's one of those not-for-public subjects that I'm going to blow wide open.  Delicately.  I hope.

You see, it all started with cheese.  Sometimes cheese and I get along.  Other times it causes me grief.  Last week caused me much grief of the quick-moving variety.  Eeew.  So to combat the looseygoosies, I chose to eat a low-fiber diet all weekend.  Bread, white rice, potatoes, and bananas.  By Tuesday of this week, I realized I hadn't had any output of these low-fiber foods.  And my gut felt really full even though I was hungry.  I called the nurse hotline provided by my health insurance group.  Nurse Jim informed me that I could give myself an enema.  Haha, I thought, no way.  He suggested some Miralax and a long walk.  So Wednesday afternoon--after a good movement finally--I took the Miralax.

Dear reader, forget anything you've seen in the movies about products that relieve constipation.  I was expecting to have looseygoosies for days.  I was foreseeing all manner of awful things happening to my poor body.  The movies are very, very wrong.

By Thursday I was in pain.  Cramping, bloating, aching, radiating pain, throbbing pain with the gurgliest tummy ever.  I'd had another good movement, but I hurt.  I felt full.  I called the nurse hotline again and asked if I should go to the doctor.  The nice nurse said no, to just call the on-call doctor and not go in yet.  So I called the on-call doctor and described my symptoms in all of their glory.  She told me to sit tight and wait.

So I waited.

And waited.

And finally had a good movement again today.

That's about every other day for the week, a little less than average I'd say, but still within the "healthy" range.  I feel full, but I am no longer in pain or cramping or feeling like I'm going to pop.  And I'm sure I'll get all sorts of lectures on the necessity of going every day (which isn't actually "normal" for most people) or the necessity of a high-fiber diet (which is good, but too much fiber can be bad) or the necessity of drinking lots of water to help (I do).

I have had two long, bad weeks in a row.  It is time for a good long weekend!

(Yes, yes I talked about poop on my blog.  Again.  No promises it won't happen again.)


cm0978 said...

I had the same problem soon after I miscarried. You're right, it's no fun at all. Good luck with next week!

MissKris said...

Don't feel badly. I talk about poop on mine, too...of the diaper variety kind, tho. Like, "Do you need to go poopy?" "Do you have a poopy diaper?" My littlest grandson just slays me lately. Whenever he's gotta go he announces it to the whole world no matter where we are. "Ahma, I POOP-ing!" he hollers...then he squats wherever...the middle of Fred Meyer, while I'm talking to my neighbor, in the library...and does just exactly what he says he's doing, LOL! Oh, it just CRACKS me UP!!!!!!! Hope you get to feeling better soon, Mrs. Jaggy.

Skunk said...

Probiotics might help, too. They've helped me a time or two...

Personally, I say well done! EVERYONE has these experiences in their life, you're just self-confident enough to be able to openly talk about it. I applaud you... for more than one reason. :)