Wednesday, September 07, 2011

Of Mud Masks and Men

He started it.  I didn't coerce him or try to encourage him or anything.  I merely suggested it after he brought it up.

We were wandering the aisles of our local drugstore recently, and he became very intent on researching every face wash known to man right that second.  Between the eighty-six washes from Clean & Clear, the Noxema and Neutrogena empires, and the Dove/Olay/Aveeno kingdoms, we were both overwhelmed.  What do these chemical-laden soaps actually do for skin?  And acids?  All the acids?  How is stripping the living daylights out of his skin going to stop it from getting angry and oily every day?  Marketing gimmicks.  That's all I could see the whole aisle long.

We went home frustrated.  I remembered I had purchased some Queen Helene's mint mud mask not too long ago, and I know it's great for coaxing oils out of my skin, so I suggested it.  He wasn't too thrilled by the idea of slathering his very manly face with some woman swamp gunk.  After twisting his arm and a little bribing ("I'll do it too so you can make fun of me!"), he finally agreed to give it a shot.

I smudged his face from his hairline to his neck with green clay paste.  Ear-to-ear, even accidentally inside his nose a bit, and perhaps a bit too near an eye ("ow, ow, it burns!"), I got his face covered with greenness.  Fifteen minutes--and far too much nervous giggling--later, we took it all off.  I convinced him to let me follow up the mud mask with a "light, refreshing toner," or what I refer to as "burning in a bottle."  His face thoroughly swept of any oil, toned into submission, and tightly clean, we applied a layer of non-greasy face lotion.

And you know what?  It really helped!  Within two or three days, his face chilled out.  His acne has disappeared for the most part, and his face looks much healthier.  A couple nights ago, with our chores out of the way and showers recently completely, he came up to me, "Babe, do you think we could do mud masks again?"



Jules said...

HA! Thank you for the laugh! I can just imagine .... I'll try and get my young boy to do this - he's hit adolescence.
Oh, and we had milkshakes with fries last night.

cm0978 said...

Ooooh, you are going to get him teased mercilessly, jaggy! But if it works, it works!

The Man said...

i feel no shame. i am beeyootiful