I've been thinking about blogging a ton lately, but I haven't sat down to do any writing in quite a while. It isn't that I have no inspiration or thoughts to write down. It isn't that I have run out of ideas for content. I have plenty to write about and lots of time to do it.
I reached a point a few months ago where I had to ask myself, "why am I here?"
For the past year, I've not been able to put my finger on it anymore. I lost sight of what I wanted out of this, and I've lost touch with my readers. That's my fault, and I'm sorry. Having those realizations, however, doesn't help me answer my question. Why am I here? Why blogging? Why writing?
Then I run into the problem of doubt. Can I write well enough to do this often? Will anyone care what I have to say? Why is my opinion worth sharing--or, even bigger, worth persuading someone to agree? What do I have to offer the blogosphere? How am I unique or different: how will my voice stand out in the crowd?
I... don't know.
And one more time I'm faced with that infernal blinking cursor as it taunts me to add a sentence, a word, a single letter of content, something, anything. I don't know all of the answers to these questions, thus the lack of posts lately. I'm trying to figure it out. I'm trying to find my voice again. It's hard.
With any good rebirth is a new plan, a new look, a new direction. I'm considering several ideas for the future of my blog including vlogging, more photography, and a whole new look complete with a proper URL.
I've also considered dropping "Jaggy" and running with my own name. Though "Jaggy" is a huge part of me, I've always felt slightly disconnected with my audience because I write under a nickname. On the other hand, that bit of pseudoanonymity has been a blessing. I've never been afraid of people reading what I write, but I don't want to make it easy for people to find me.
Have you ever had to take a break from something? How did you get back into it? If you blog, are you anonymous, or do you use your real name? Why do you blog?